Founder Failures
The latest startup ideas we destroyed, sorted newest first. A wall of shame for pitches that should never have left the group chat.
24 total roasts
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Jun 30, 2026, 9:03 AM
AI-Powered Dating App: Because Nothing Sells Like "Technically Not Tinder"
AI-powered dating app
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Jun 14, 2026, 3:15 PM
Entrepreneurial Autodidact: The Only Degree You Need Is Click "Next" On MintMe
start my own crypto
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Jun 14, 2026, 7:28 AM
The "Fleshlight for Slack" Initiative
Ai porn
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Jun 14, 2026, 4:27 AM
Theory: Hyatt body, Marriot mind: The "More Slingy" Hotel Chain
chain hotels but with real gyms: lots of barbells squat racks and shit
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Jun 13, 2026, 4:48 PM
🧃 "Boba But Make It Soul: Liquid Diabetes for the Oppressed Office Worker"
bubble tea for black communities
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Jun 13, 2026, 4:47 PM
Just Another "Better Burger" in a Sea of Generic Litigation Letters
5 guys but with better burger
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Jun 13, 2026, 4:45 PM
Mountain-Propelled Horizons: Because Earth-Gravity is too mainstream.
spaceX but for snow mountains
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Jun 13, 2026, 4:34 PM
Elon Musk Wakes Up in the Bathtub, Gets Wet, and Decides to Take It Personally
spaceX but for deep sea
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Jun 13, 2026, 4:31 PM
"Khinchin’s Grand Experiment: Fast Food for a Country That Can't Eat Downtime"
MacDonalds but for Ukrainian food
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Jun 13, 2026, 4:26 PM
"The Banh-McZinger: Trying to Sell Emotion in a Foil Wrap"
MacDonalds but for vietnamese food
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Jun 13, 2026, 4:25 PM
Innovation Alert: The "Wait, I Read a Blog Post" Genesis
Ethereum blockchain but with cheaper fee
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Jun 13, 2026, 4:19 PM
Better Than Bitcoin™: The 'I Moved One 'Q' On The Keyboard' Strategy
a crypto coin that is better than Bitcoin
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Jun 13, 2026, 4:10 PM
I'll Pay You to Borrow My Money: The AI That Gets High on Loan Sharking
derivatives exchange liquidation engine but using deep learning to simulate risky scenarios to optimize for lowest margin requirement that attracts everyone to…
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Jun 13, 2026, 4:01 PM
“iPhone but Cheaper”: Intellectual Property Theft or Just Severe Lack of Sleep?
iPhone but cheaper
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Jun 13, 2026, 3:41 PM
The "Black, Slightly Cropped, Guacamole-Brown Buttoned" Jacket™: Exactly the Gimmick VCs Don't Need
A jacket company that only produces Jensen Huang's type
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Jun 13, 2026, 3:39 PM
Copy Elon, Lose Millions: A Playbook for Buying Zero Real Estate in the Valley
An AI that thinks like Elon Musk
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Jun 13, 2026, 3:36 PM
*Satellite Clown for a CEO: The NVIDIA of the Void is a No-Show for You*
nivida but for spaceships
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Jun 13, 2026, 3:22 PM
The Intellectual Exercise of Making Mud Pies: Facebook, Uber, and TikTok Hand-Tossed in a Blender
a facebook and uber and tiktok mix
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Jun 13, 2026, 3:16 PM
🤣 Just Rename Orders to "Blocks" and Call It Magic
A layer one blockchain that works as a CEX matching engine. but it packs multiple orders into a block and rearranges their orders for liquidity maximization
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Jun 13, 2026, 10:53 AM
Tinder for Dogs: "Examining the Shallow End of a Debated Concept"
tinder for dogs
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Jun 13, 2026, 10:27 AM
Revolutionary Transparency: Now with 99% Less Engagement and Infinite Gas Fees
Blockchain social network
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Jun 13, 2026, 10:19 AM
Netflix for Books: Finally, a way to procrastinate without the 'buffering.'
Netflix for books
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Jun 13, 2026, 9:54 AM
The Algorithmic Zen Paradox: Selling Silence with a Subscription Fee
AI-powered meditation app
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Jun 13, 2026, 9:54 AM
The 'Idea Roaster' – A Self-Own in Code Form
AI that roasts start up ideas



